As writer-pal Les Combs says, “I do” the rest of the world says, “It’s a girl, it’s a girl, it’s a girl.”
 In the early morning hour, the San Francisco Bay Area welcomes a new resident, Cynthia Marie.
1953 –
 Disney’s Peter Pan premieres at the Roxy Theatre in New York City
Gas is $ .20 per gallon and the average US annual income is $4,000
Fred Muggs, a chimp, is hired as a regular on the Today Show
Marilyn Monroe poses nude for the first edition of Playboy magazine
Cynthia poses nude on her pink blanket and nobody cares
1961 – Cynthia writes her first novelette, The Pumpkinhead Family, complete with illustrations. The first edition, stapled at the seam and dog-eared at the corners is a collector’s item and should you find it, please call Cynthia and she’ll collect the item.
1965 – Cynthia wins first place for an essay on conservation. An indication that  she’ll grow to love the environment, exploring nature and fight for animals.
1970 – Her first column complete with byline! Cynthia is hired by the Hayward Daily Review newspaper as the “Teen Time”columnist for Hayward High School. At $.25 per column inch, Cynthia learns the realities of a writer’s life. A starving teen, she never misses a deadline.
1973 – Of Scottish roots, Cynthia marries and takes on a German name. Soon, Karl, Erin and Grant arrive and she becomes Mommy
1986 – Cynthia steps into the role of single mom. She learns to fly solo in the parenthood seat. Navigational skills questionable, she moves forward in uncharted territory. Kids tighten seat belts.
1999 – The kids declare. Mom, it’s your time. They present her with a Chicken Soup for the Soul submission. Embraced with the support, she writes “Bare Bottoms and Dancing Toes”. Minutes from the deadline, she drops the story into the mailbox. Ready for celebration, she buys a bottle of two-buck Chuck. Weeks move forward, the mailman drops a rejection notice in the mail. She drinks the two-buck wine anyway.
2000 – Tenacious, she joins an online writer’s group, Writer’s Village University. She sends Cyber classmates screaming down invisible halls with her untamed creativity. She stays, polishes her POV, structure and beginnings, middles and ends. “I’m Not Broken” is a third place winner at the SF Writer’s Conference.
2001 – Just for fun Cynthia enters a portion of her work at a site called the Gender Genie. The genie analyzes the passage and decides if the writer is male or female. The gender-genie claims she’s a male writer. Over and over again. An editor looking for another Dave Barry finds Cynthia and soon her column, Belly Laughs, hits the Internet. Must be friends with the genie.
2003 – Her first novel, No More Bobs, a who's-on-first mystery, hits the shelves with five-star reviews. And yes, like any good writer she did the field research and dated seven Bobs and counting in one year.
2004 - Open to exploring the possibilities of all possibilities, Cynthia accepts a humor columnist position for a SF Bay Area magazine. One of her favorite columns, “A Duffer with a Duck Hook”, lands a hole in one with golfers and “A Tequila Sunrise” draws in the singles.
Chicken Soup for the Recovering Soul publishes “Bare Bottoms and Dancing Toes”. Yes! Cynthia graduates to champagne.
2007 – Elated, she discovers the National Society of Newspaper Columnists. She finds it doesn’t matter if you write for the New York Times, Chicago Sun or on one-ply toilet tissue for a backwoods weekly, you’re all family. She’s embraced with the warmth of like-minds. Finally, she’s come home.
2008 –
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull premieres
Gas crosses $4 per gallon and the average US annual income is $44,389
Matt Lauer, not a chimp, hosts the Today Show
Lindsay Lohan poses nude as Marilyn Monroe and no one cares
Cynthia poses nude on her pink blanket and someone cares
Working hard on her next novel, Plot 37, Cynthia decides to start dating again. With two SF Giants baseball tickets in hand, she posts an ad, the first two guys to respond – Robert and Bob.
It’s official, she’s back in the game…
Cynthia is an active member of the following groups and invites you to join, too.
National Society of Newspaper Columnists
Erma Bombeck Humor Writers
Redroom
Women’s National Book Association SF Chapter
Top |
